indecision

One of those days.

I thought I’d sneak away for a while, just me and run a few errands. Dogs have radar for this. So no matter how nonchalant or casual I was about it I couldn’t get past the hallway to the garage door. Somebody’s nose would appear as if to say, “you’re not leaving without us, are you?”

It’s getting to where it will be too warm for Lily and Lulu to go for rides with me. We will be having our morning walkies before the sun rises and after it sets. So no errands.

Today has been the same. Rain squall, then almost sun, then grey. All day it’s been trying to decide whether to just all-out rain or not.

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Since the beginning of the Lenten season from Ash Wednesday I turned off the television. At first maybe about a week I have withdrawals. Strange how I can get so used to the noise and nonsense coming out of a large piece of electronics. Then I settle in to the silence. I hear birds more, breezes, crickets even now that it’s warmer. I hear neighbors laughing and talking.

I hear life.

Funny how insulated I can be inside a house with artificial noise. Without it time goes more slowly, things become deliberate. My head is clearer.

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Well, comparatively so. I read more books. I made some wind chimes out of those really large sea urchin spines.

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I made a bracelet with shells I have been finding on the beach in the shape of a heart. I discovered these are the “insole” part of a seashell called a lady’s slipper, but when the outer part breaks away it leaves this piece

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so I thought they’d look pretty in a bracelet. I don’t wear jewelry. At all, ever. So if I make these I’ll have to give them away or something. And I have thousands of these shell pieces since I have collected them for years and they are everywhere here where I live, though I have never seen them on any other beach.

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But somehow the Saturday before Resurrection Sunday has me in its grip. I can’t help but wonder how those disciples and followers of Jesus must have felt. Here was the One they knew was Messiah. And He had died. They watched it. Well, John and some of the women. How dark, frightening that must have been. Jesus tried to tell them He would rise and live but I don’t think I would have understood what He was saying either, even if I’d been a witness to His raising Lazarus.

I know how this story ends. With joy! Victory! Life and hope. Newness.

But Saturday. Somehow it helps me to have this day, dark as it must have been because I know what happens.

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17 thoughts on “indecision

  1. You post the best pictures! I love jewelry, bracelets are my favorite things – I wear ten at a time, some are diamonds that Bear has given me over the years, one is a silver sun and moon links that my mother gave me the last Christmas she was alive. If I lived near you, I would be drooling over the ones you made until I guilted you into selling me all you could make. And then I’d wear them and jangle with joy. I think you should try it. 🙂

    • Thanks. The flowers around my house are beautiful this year! The bracelets are an experiment. I have collected so many of these shells that’s the only thing I thought to do with them. They aren’t shaped to easily glue them to something, flower pots maybe. So I bought 5 feet of bracelet chain and started making them. I guess I can donate them to a good place to sell. Last year I made my brother’s wife, my niece & my sons girlfriend silver bracelets with charms of stuff they love in life. No one wore them, nor thanked me for them! Discouraging. And expensive!!

  2. what an awesome quote!
    love the flowers. am gonna try to plant sunflowers next for my neighbor.
    i used to make jewelry at home, until i realized my supplies cost more than buying them to give as gifts. and i made them poorly, that they kept breaking. yours look nice and solid. how cool your supplies are right there to pick up for free! your photos cheered me up today 😊💖

    • Thank you! I have wondered about the expense of these bracelets but like you mentioned the shells are free! How thoughtful of you to do such a good thing for your neighbor. Thank you so much for reading my blog.

  3. Such a beautiful post. The wind chime and bracelet you made is so pretty. I also don’t really wear jewelry, earrings sometimes. It feels good when you give gifts to others, it’s like a gift to ourself.

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